When did you last tell yourself how fantastic you are? Ace? Bonzer? Wicked?
Whaaat??? Well, when did you last tell yourself how fantastic you are? Or amazing? Or wonderful? Or terrific? Or real swell?
For most of us the answer is surely "Can't remember". Or even "Never".
Don't be ridiculous -- I'm not fantastic! Why would I tell myself something that's so patently wrong!
I'm not big-headed. Or vain. Why would I want to puff myself up with pride?
At best, it's incorrect. It's wrong. It's bad!!
OK then. When did you last tell yourself how rubbish or useless you are?
Ohhh, yesterday? A couple of hours ago? Within the last five minutes?
At this point, you probably expect me to tell you that, no, you are wonderful! Think that instead!! But I'm not going to. I couldn't do that straight off for myself, and I'm guessing you can't make that switch without a bit more work.
Like bass player Jim taking the National Brass Band Trophy in the film Brassed Off, right after Danny's made an emotional speech refusing it, there's a bit of me going "Don't talk so !*##&! soft!".
Try to get out of this bit of logic...
Being brought up among a lot of plain-talkers (hmmm, ADHD has a strong genetic component and turned-down impulse control is one of its features....), and having spent a lot of time in a society where "you shouldn't need to be told when you're doing well -- we'll soon let you know if you go wrong" (so the best you can hope for is zero!!), it doesn't come easy to me to praise myself. And I've seen that in a lot of my clients with ADHD too.
But I have managed to come up with some logic that got me, grudgingly at first, over this barrier.
See if it works for you.
Just how true actually are all the insults we fling at ourselves? Probably not so much. But we still do it, frequently. So, as a counterbalance, why not fling praise at ourselves? Doesn't have to be completely true, but we can still do it.
Logical, captain!
Haha!!
Here's your challenge.
For the next half-hour, tell yourself that you're wonderful, terrific, awesome, awesomesauce, fantastic, wicked, ace, bostin', bonzer, epic!!!
Any time you go out for a walk, same!
Balance up the insults and talking down. If you want to be really finicky about it, count all the times you find yourself insulting yourself and come up with the same number of praises/approvals/esteems! (Do you know, there are 43 synonyms for "insult" in my online thesaurus and only 14 antonyms?)
How do you feel afterwards? Better than zero? Did your head grow an extra hat size? Did you have fun?
What could it do for you if this became part of your everyday life?
I'd love to hear from you how it went. What's your most totally best belter of a praise word?
Drop me a comment or tell us on the Facebook page.
Whaaat??? Well, when did you last tell yourself how fantastic you are? Or amazing? Or wonderful? Or terrific? Or real swell?
For most of us the answer is surely "Can't remember". Or even "Never".
Don't be ridiculous -- I'm not fantastic! Why would I tell myself something that's so patently wrong!
I'm not big-headed. Or vain. Why would I want to puff myself up with pride?
At best, it's incorrect. It's wrong. It's bad!!
OK then. When did you last tell yourself how rubbish or useless you are?
Ohhh, yesterday? A couple of hours ago? Within the last five minutes?
At this point, you probably expect me to tell you that, no, you are wonderful! Think that instead!! But I'm not going to. I couldn't do that straight off for myself, and I'm guessing you can't make that switch without a bit more work.
Like bass player Jim taking the National Brass Band Trophy in the film Brassed Off, right after Danny's made an emotional speech refusing it, there's a bit of me going "Don't talk so !*##&! soft!".
Try to get out of this bit of logic...
Being brought up among a lot of plain-talkers (hmmm, ADHD has a strong genetic component and turned-down impulse control is one of its features....), and having spent a lot of time in a society where "you shouldn't need to be told when you're doing well -- we'll soon let you know if you go wrong" (so the best you can hope for is zero!!), it doesn't come easy to me to praise myself. And I've seen that in a lot of my clients with ADHD too.
But I have managed to come up with some logic that got me, grudgingly at first, over this barrier.
See if it works for you.
Just how true actually are all the insults we fling at ourselves? Probably not so much. But we still do it, frequently. So, as a counterbalance, why not fling praise at ourselves? Doesn't have to be completely true, but we can still do it.
Logical, captain!
Haha!!
Here's your challenge.
For the next half-hour, tell yourself that you're wonderful, terrific, awesome, awesomesauce, fantastic, wicked, ace, bostin', bonzer, epic!!!
Any time you go out for a walk, same!
Balance up the insults and talking down. If you want to be really finicky about it, count all the times you find yourself insulting yourself and come up with the same number of praises/approvals/esteems! (Do you know, there are 43 synonyms for "insult" in my online thesaurus and only 14 antonyms?)
How do you feel afterwards? Better than zero? Did your head grow an extra hat size? Did you have fun?
What could it do for you if this became part of your everyday life?
I'd love to hear from you how it went. What's your most totally best belter of a praise word?
Drop me a comment or tell us on the Facebook page.